Six Long Months

We are a nation that counts birthdays and anniversaries.  It's no different after the loss of someone special to us. You start out counting how many weeks, then it's a month, then it moves to 3 months and now 6 months. People tell me that 1 year is  a big anniversary and then you usually only count the yearly anniversaries of when the death occurred. It is still hard for me to comprehend that so much can happen in 6 months and how much my life has chanaged in only 6 months.

What I have learned in the last 6 months:

• Planning a trip isn’t near as much fun when you don’t have anyone to share it with.
• The depth of emotions that are within me.  I learned to not hold emotions in like I have done all my life but to let them surface.  
• The death of a spouse is nothing like a divorce.  The death is so much harder to handle.
• Pets grieve in many of the same ways that humans do.
• The value of friends who are there whenever you need them.
• Losing a “spouse” is nothing like losing a parent or close friend.
• Everyone deals with grief differently and there is no “right way”.
• There is no time frame on “getting over it”.
• Little things of his mean a lot to me. i.e. his Medic Alert dog tag with transplants listed
• How important it is to discuss “what to do when I’m gone”.
• Sometimes it’s the little things that can trigger tears.
• How much comfort a bag of little Snickers or a big, juicy hamburger can be.
• I hate it but can deal with lizards and bugs in the house on my own. i.e. 2 ½” hard-shell beetle or a lizard.
• Sounds in the night. i.e. something on the roof and sometimes in the back yard.
• How hard it is to bet back into the groove of doing chores that usually Larry did even thought I did them for years before we got together. i.e. taking trash out, spraying/pulling weeds in the yard, sweeping out the garage, dealing with repair companies.
• Just because you lived alone in the past doesn’t make it any easier now.
• How to take life One Day At A Time.